My Unlikely Magic

Saturday, June 6, 2015

"Above all things, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. "

Roald Dahl- Charlie & The Chocolate Factory 

My unlikely magic... the opportunity to carry and be the mamma of this brave, beautiful, bold one.

 Would you look at those little feet curled around each other.

This one, an unlikely gift for a girl like me... terrified of being too inadequate to raise a girl well, positive I was too damaged to mother anyone into a healthy woman, confident I wasn't equipped to teach her to be "girly" enough, strong enough, submissive enough, trusting enough, smart enough, confident enough... She changed all those fears into faith like no other bc He made her exactly the way she was supposed to be. 

She is Jesus's redeeming grace in my life, proof that with Him all things are possible, that I'm worthy & equipped to be this girls mamma & that none of my failures and hurts have to be passed on to her! Chains are broken, we are free.... I haven't arrived but I'm wiser than before. 

I failed myself and others so many times bc I didn't know or believe my own worth, yet this girl is like a blank canvas of opportunity for God to use all my broken pieces and write a new story,  one where I live fully so she that has no doubt about what it looks like to be confident in the skin God gave her. She was truly born knowing who and who's she is, I think I was too, but somewhere along the way, my spirit broke realizing I wasn't enough for a lot of people & I was too way too much for just as many. Anybody else? I got so lost in it. 

My promise to this one though.. to always lead her to see her own magic, to live a life that's brave & true to the God that made her and one that is a reflection of what we "preach". She has become my inspiration and motivation to live true to my souls conviction, to dream & be willing to fail, to be courageous, vulnerable, to be inquisitive & to never stop learning so that she never questions living any other way. 

She'll always be not enough for some & way to much for others, we all will, but I want her to always rest & be confident in the truth of who she was born to be. For always.


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